One of my favorite movies of all time is High Fidelity, which is based off a Nick Hornby novel and stars John Cusack - that is one of my favorite authors and favorite actors, so that explains my adoration of the movie. In the film, the main character is basically going through the Top 5 break-ups of his life. It doesn't sound very cheerful, but it is a hilarious movie, and afterwards you will find yourself obsessively making Top 5 lists for everything.
Take this knowledge and combine it with the latest adventure I've undertaken with my friend Mallory. The other day at work, one of the lawyers was playing Dave Matthews so loud I thought my ears were bleeding. Ironically, Mallory emailed me (even though we are two cubicles from each other) how annoyed she was because she also hates Dave Matthews. This started a conversation back and forth about music, and we came to discover that we have more even more similarities. It is truly becoming creepy.
So, Mallory and I started discussing music. As I've mentioned before, I am a rather "old soul" when it comes to music. Mallory is a total hipster in the best way. She listens to music before it becomes part of a movie's soundtrack because some LA jackass "discovered" the band in some concert circuit. Without making a solid plan of it, we both started compiling lists of our all-time favorite songs. She is BA and finished her's that night and came up with 85 songs, which can be read here: http://malloryalyse.blogspot.com/ I am not that music savvy, so I'm going to take the High Fidelity route and list my Top 5 songs, with some alternates because that's how I roll (and there are so many good ones to throw out there, but I don't want to diverge from the Top 5 idea). So, here we go:
1. "Better Man" by Pearl Jam
2. "Hey Girl" by O.A.R.
3. "The Joker" by Steve Miller Band
4. "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison
5. "Collie Man" by Slightly Stoopid
Alternates:
"Baba O'Riley" by The Who
"What Is and What Should Never Be" by Led Zeppelin
"Farmhouse" by Phish
"Hear You Me" by Jimmy Eat World
"Champagne Supernova" by Oasis
"The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows" by Brand New
"The Sounds of Silence" by Simon and Garfunkel
"Let It Be" by The Beatles
There is something about #1 that gets me every single time I hear it. Maybe it's because I saw Pearl Jam in concert a few years ago (ok, almost 5 years ago... because I am getting really old) and the song holds some really great memories for me of a really great person. It also used to be my ringtone. It is a little bitter and sad, but I've always chosen to interpret it incorrectly and pretend it's positive. No harm, no foul.
The next one is my all-time favorite O.A.R. song, and I have a lot of 'em. I've also seen O.A.R. in concert four times, each show being better than the last and culminating with an amazing show at Red Rocks Ampitheater in Denver. I love this song for so many reasons, one of which is because when I saw them in Kansas City, a guy proposed to his girlfriend on stage in the middle of this song (it was planned beforehand with the band, which is even cooler). Oh, this song also used to be my ringtone.
Ahh, Steve Miller. I knew a guy in high school named Steve Miller. Clever parents. Anyway, this song just kills me in a good way. "I'm a picker, I'm a grinner, I'm a lover, and I'm a sinner." It might as well be my biography, which is why I think I love it so much. Plus, the "wah waaahh" part makes me giggle. Go listen to it and you'll see what I mean. And guess what? This also used to be my ringtone.
#4 is self-explanatory. My uncle has danced with me to this song at every family wedding I've ever been to, so it also has a traditional-aspect to it. In a world full of blue-eyed beauties, it's nice for the "mud pie" -eyed girls to get some lovin', plus Van Morrison is badass. No, this was never my ringtone, but it is the ringtone you hear when I call my mother. I set that one up for her, and I'm sure she's never been more grateful.
And lastly, the wild card. No, this song doesn't fit in with the rest of them. But at just over two minutes long, somehow this song can completely elevate my mood no matter what. It is the single most-played song on my iTunes, beating out the next most frequent by almost one hundred plays. It's a really chill song and completely unlike any other Slightly Stoopid song, but it's phenomenal. It also has one of my favorite lyrics of all time: "Some man lives his life on profits alone/ that very same man he lives his life all alone."
So there you have it, my Top 5 songs and a handful of alternates. It is a really interesting aspect to see what songs have withstood the test of time, because I go through so many phases of musical preferences and will listen to nearly anything. Check out Mallory's eccentric list, but be sure to round out your musical adventure with some older stuff off mine.
Where words fail, music speaks.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
elitist teenage dreaming.
One of my jobs is working as a substitute in an area school district, which happens to be the same one in which I student taught. I like this because I know the building, administrators, and other teachers really well. I don’t like this because the more I feel removed from the teaching profession, and the less I want to be a teacher, the more I feel like a failure that everyone in the building is looking at in horror. You see, teachers are interesting creatures. We deal with a lot of bullshit, whether from parents, the community, or the students. It comes with the deal, and most teachers will say it’s worth the trade-off because there are a lot of wonderful things about being a teacher. There were days when I would leave school laughing because it seemed absurd that my job was that fun – seriously, how many people can say that?
But teachers are also elitist in a very peculiar way. Once you’ve been inducted into the profession, if you choose to leave you are basically ostracized (or at least feel that way based on the reactions you get from everyone). I still haven’t told some of my teacher friends that I am considering going to law school over signing a teaching contract in the fall. This is because when I do, I usually get a look of utter betrayal, as though my choice not to teach directly influences my validity as a human being. You think I’m kidding. I understand that teaching is an important profession and that it is one of the noblest jobs on Earth. For that very reason, you don’t want people who aren’t utterly passionate about it in the classroom – trust me. But what about other jobs that are just as important? They do exist. Like… maybe an attorney who represents juveniles who actually likes juveniles and isn’t afraid of teenagers? But let’s move on before I get much more agitated.
Subbing is easily the best worst job possible. It’s the best job because half the time you get to sit there and do whatever you want, be it reading, writing, or doodling. It’s the worst job for the exact same reasons: sometimes you sit there and do absolutely nothing. Oh, and it eliminates every positive attached to teaching – the relationships with students, the ability to see growth, and the basic concept of knowing what the hell is going on when you walk in a classroom. With that in mind, when I substitute I usually do one of three things. I either 1) have some type of work to do, like editing my personal statements or reading for a class I’m taking; 2) doodle, update my calendar, or daydream until I realize I’m being stared at by students; or 3) do actual teaching, which only happens if I’m subbing for the lady I student taught with last year. Occasionally I have my computer with me, so I can sit at the front of the room and type random thoughts and look like I’m doing something teacher-ly. Sometimes these thoughts become a blog and…. Well, hello there!
Yes, as I write this I am sitting in the art room at a middle school in the Des Moines area. It doesn’t matter in the least, but the kiddos are working on drawing a narrative of their lives (so much to say about all 13 years of it!). I’ve been asked questions like: What represents me? (Don’t know, kid, I’ve never met you.) How do you draw an airplane? (Do I look like I have any idea how to draw a square, let alone an airplane?) What if soccer is the ONLY thing that defines me? (Um…..) There’s also the fun component that this teacher turns on the radio when the students sketch, and it’s predictably set to 107.5 (the Top 20 station in Des Moines). This is fine, until awkward commercials for skanky bars or “intimate toy” party companies fill the silent space of the classroom. I’m constantly amused by how much goes over the heads of middle school students. It makes sense, of course, but our world is so inappropriate sometimes it’s nice to see some facet of innocence. Maybe that’s why people are so scared of adolescents. They hear the latest Rihanna song, understand the lyrics, and logically assume that adolescents do, too, which would scare me as well. Let me debunk that now: while students may get the general idea of “Rude Boy,” I promise you they aren’t listening close enough to the words to realize exactly what part of the body she is singing about. Thank the stars for that.
Subbing also has the side effect of making me re-live my education on a near daily basis. This isn’t as terrifying or horrific as it may sound. I certainly didn’t like high school, but it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve had to experience. Rather, on days like today I am reminded of the art classes I took in high school, which leads me to remember the Notebook my friend Anna and I wrote, drew, and stuck crap in, and then traded every Wednesday (we didn’t attend the same high school). My pages were always full of words, line-to-line, paragraph after paragraph. Her pages were always full of sketches and magazine clippings she ripped out of magazines I’d never heard of. Not much as changed, and I still try to make things I give her a little artistic, much like I did the Notebook. So, it logically concludes that I would work on the Notebook in my art class; hence the trip down memory lane and bout of nostalgia. Are you with me now?
It’s also easy to see the different types of students that always have and always will be present in every class. You have the girl who is years ahead of her peers in the way she wears her hair and clothing, and subsequently presents herself. She is always the popular girl who the males gutsy enough to talk to her revolve around. You have your immature boys, right alongside the boys who hit their growth spurt years ago and as a result seem to have this self-assured confidence. Then you have students who look like they are living in their heads, and you can bet they are living in a post-high school world where they don’t have to deal with the people they are actually around. The nerds, the band kids, the artsy ones, the angsty ones, the ones who like talking to the teacher… I’ll stop because I’m sure we’ve all seen The Breakfast Club and know the stereotypes and labels. I often wonder how my teachers perceived me in high school.
I rarely talked to anyone (all my good friends went to other schools), I took every English class possible but managed to fail AP English (crappy teacher, honestly), I wore any school other than Urbandale’s apparel, and I didn’t fit into any one group. I hung out with druggies, brains, band kids, and the freaks and geeks when I had to hang out with people at all. I was a dreamer. I guess it isn’t a surprise to me that even as a substitute, I still do that. I still doodle in my agenda, stare off into space daydreaming about anywhere but where I am, write letters to my friends, and imagine what life will be like when I’m actually content.
Ok, and occasionally I teach, too. That, at least, is a vague semblance of redemption from the teachers everywhere who would rather I spout blasphemy against the union than leave the profession. Until then, I have to go turn off the radio because I cannot listen to “Teenage Dream” one more time, even if the students don’t have any idea what Katy Perry is referencing.
But teachers are also elitist in a very peculiar way. Once you’ve been inducted into the profession, if you choose to leave you are basically ostracized (or at least feel that way based on the reactions you get from everyone). I still haven’t told some of my teacher friends that I am considering going to law school over signing a teaching contract in the fall. This is because when I do, I usually get a look of utter betrayal, as though my choice not to teach directly influences my validity as a human being. You think I’m kidding. I understand that teaching is an important profession and that it is one of the noblest jobs on Earth. For that very reason, you don’t want people who aren’t utterly passionate about it in the classroom – trust me. But what about other jobs that are just as important? They do exist. Like… maybe an attorney who represents juveniles who actually likes juveniles and isn’t afraid of teenagers? But let’s move on before I get much more agitated.
Subbing is easily the best worst job possible. It’s the best job because half the time you get to sit there and do whatever you want, be it reading, writing, or doodling. It’s the worst job for the exact same reasons: sometimes you sit there and do absolutely nothing. Oh, and it eliminates every positive attached to teaching – the relationships with students, the ability to see growth, and the basic concept of knowing what the hell is going on when you walk in a classroom. With that in mind, when I substitute I usually do one of three things. I either 1) have some type of work to do, like editing my personal statements or reading for a class I’m taking; 2) doodle, update my calendar, or daydream until I realize I’m being stared at by students; or 3) do actual teaching, which only happens if I’m subbing for the lady I student taught with last year. Occasionally I have my computer with me, so I can sit at the front of the room and type random thoughts and look like I’m doing something teacher-ly. Sometimes these thoughts become a blog and…. Well, hello there!
Yes, as I write this I am sitting in the art room at a middle school in the Des Moines area. It doesn’t matter in the least, but the kiddos are working on drawing a narrative of their lives (so much to say about all 13 years of it!). I’ve been asked questions like: What represents me? (Don’t know, kid, I’ve never met you.) How do you draw an airplane? (Do I look like I have any idea how to draw a square, let alone an airplane?) What if soccer is the ONLY thing that defines me? (Um…..) There’s also the fun component that this teacher turns on the radio when the students sketch, and it’s predictably set to 107.5 (the Top 20 station in Des Moines). This is fine, until awkward commercials for skanky bars or “intimate toy” party companies fill the silent space of the classroom. I’m constantly amused by how much goes over the heads of middle school students. It makes sense, of course, but our world is so inappropriate sometimes it’s nice to see some facet of innocence. Maybe that’s why people are so scared of adolescents. They hear the latest Rihanna song, understand the lyrics, and logically assume that adolescents do, too, which would scare me as well. Let me debunk that now: while students may get the general idea of “Rude Boy,” I promise you they aren’t listening close enough to the words to realize exactly what part of the body she is singing about. Thank the stars for that.
Subbing also has the side effect of making me re-live my education on a near daily basis. This isn’t as terrifying or horrific as it may sound. I certainly didn’t like high school, but it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve had to experience. Rather, on days like today I am reminded of the art classes I took in high school, which leads me to remember the Notebook my friend Anna and I wrote, drew, and stuck crap in, and then traded every Wednesday (we didn’t attend the same high school). My pages were always full of words, line-to-line, paragraph after paragraph. Her pages were always full of sketches and magazine clippings she ripped out of magazines I’d never heard of. Not much as changed, and I still try to make things I give her a little artistic, much like I did the Notebook. So, it logically concludes that I would work on the Notebook in my art class; hence the trip down memory lane and bout of nostalgia. Are you with me now?
It’s also easy to see the different types of students that always have and always will be present in every class. You have the girl who is years ahead of her peers in the way she wears her hair and clothing, and subsequently presents herself. She is always the popular girl who the males gutsy enough to talk to her revolve around. You have your immature boys, right alongside the boys who hit their growth spurt years ago and as a result seem to have this self-assured confidence. Then you have students who look like they are living in their heads, and you can bet they are living in a post-high school world where they don’t have to deal with the people they are actually around. The nerds, the band kids, the artsy ones, the angsty ones, the ones who like talking to the teacher… I’ll stop because I’m sure we’ve all seen The Breakfast Club and know the stereotypes and labels. I often wonder how my teachers perceived me in high school.
I rarely talked to anyone (all my good friends went to other schools), I took every English class possible but managed to fail AP English (crappy teacher, honestly), I wore any school other than Urbandale’s apparel, and I didn’t fit into any one group. I hung out with druggies, brains, band kids, and the freaks and geeks when I had to hang out with people at all. I was a dreamer. I guess it isn’t a surprise to me that even as a substitute, I still do that. I still doodle in my agenda, stare off into space daydreaming about anywhere but where I am, write letters to my friends, and imagine what life will be like when I’m actually content.
Ok, and occasionally I teach, too. That, at least, is a vague semblance of redemption from the teachers everywhere who would rather I spout blasphemy against the union than leave the profession. Until then, I have to go turn off the radio because I cannot listen to “Teenage Dream” one more time, even if the students don’t have any idea what Katy Perry is referencing.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
hippie love.
I went on an iTunes spending spree tonight. I love a few things about iTunes: first, you can pick and choose which songs you want to buy off an album, instead of wasting money on those lame filler songs that all too often show up. Second, if you already have a song purchased off an album, iTunes has a "complete my album" option that discounts the price. Lastly, I love not having actual CDs to mess with. When it comes to books, I love the feel of paper and the weight of the book in my hands. When it comes to music, I'm a firm believer that MP3s are the best thing to happen to mankind. But I digress...
So, my spending spree. I purchased music from the following artists: The Steve Miller Band, Tommy James and the Shondells, Neil Diamond, Scott McKenzie, and Phish. With the exception of the last artist, you probably noticed a pattern. Dig through your parents' old record collection and they probably own the vinyl of those cats. It's not a surprise to anyone who knows me, but I adore '60s music. I mean, I straight up love listening to it, along with the stories my parents tell me about growing up in the '60s. When I was a little girl, the only thing I ever wanted to listen to on the radio was 93.3 (the oldies station in Des Moines) and I remember hiding records when my dad was selling them in a garage sale; I managed to save Aretha Franklin, Lesley Gore, and the Supremes. One of the major reasons why I splurged on satellite radio in my car is the channel "60s on 6" and my friends will attest to the fact that I can sing along to nearly all of the songs they play. I could go on, but I think you get the point.
I'm not one of those people who will admonish the state of music today compared to "back then." I can't do that in good faith, because I admit that I actually like Ke$ha (I really don't mind if you judge me). I just recognize that you can't compare Ke$ha to, say, the Doors. I hope you laughed at the thought, because that is exactly my point. Why do people get so pretentious when it comes to music? I listen to both kinds of music at different times depending on my mood. If I'm bummed out at work, you better believe I'm rocking to Ke$ha. If I'm on a road-trip, there is nothing better than the Eagles or Tom Petty. God bless the iPod, fo'real.
But back to my love of '60s music. Another reason why I love it all so much is because I really, really wish I had been alive during that era so I could have been a hippie. I absolutely would have been a hippie. In some ways, I think I am one now. Don't get me wrong; I do love technology and want to have a real job someday, but I also really dig the happy-go-lucky, be natural and love the earth, be good to each other and be idealistic mindset. I would have been that girl in San Francisco with flowers in her hair (and sans mustache, Scott McKenzie is not bad looking either). Plus, things just weren't as serious in the '60s. I'm not saying that things like Vietnam and the assassinations of prolific national leaders were knee-slappin' good times, but consider something like the environment. People care about the environment today because we have really, really screwed that shit up. In the '60s, I wager that most people cared because they just loved the earth. I wish people would care about the earth just because its beautiful and the right thing to do, not because we're all terrified what will happen if we can't drive our SUV to the grocery store 3 blocks away to buy overly-packaged food chalk full of preservatives fresh from South America. But, that's another story for another day. No, the 60s were tumultuous, but they were still considerably more chill than life today.
Maybe tomorrow I will dig around in my boxes of childhood mementos for the Halloween costume I insisted on wearing three years in a row: a hippie wearing an bohemian shirt, bell bottoms, Lennon sunglasses, and a ribbon around my forehead. Or, maybe I will just update my iPod's "Golden Oldies" playlist with all my recent purchases on iTunes, and happily sing to myself in my cubicle at work. It will probably be the latter, so I hope my neighboring co-worker is prepared to hear my rendition of Steve Miller's Jungle Town. We can only hope.
So, my spending spree. I purchased music from the following artists: The Steve Miller Band, Tommy James and the Shondells, Neil Diamond, Scott McKenzie, and Phish. With the exception of the last artist, you probably noticed a pattern. Dig through your parents' old record collection and they probably own the vinyl of those cats. It's not a surprise to anyone who knows me, but I adore '60s music. I mean, I straight up love listening to it, along with the stories my parents tell me about growing up in the '60s. When I was a little girl, the only thing I ever wanted to listen to on the radio was 93.3 (the oldies station in Des Moines) and I remember hiding records when my dad was selling them in a garage sale; I managed to save Aretha Franklin, Lesley Gore, and the Supremes. One of the major reasons why I splurged on satellite radio in my car is the channel "60s on 6" and my friends will attest to the fact that I can sing along to nearly all of the songs they play. I could go on, but I think you get the point.
I'm not one of those people who will admonish the state of music today compared to "back then." I can't do that in good faith, because I admit that I actually like Ke$ha (I really don't mind if you judge me). I just recognize that you can't compare Ke$ha to, say, the Doors. I hope you laughed at the thought, because that is exactly my point. Why do people get so pretentious when it comes to music? I listen to both kinds of music at different times depending on my mood. If I'm bummed out at work, you better believe I'm rocking to Ke$ha. If I'm on a road-trip, there is nothing better than the Eagles or Tom Petty. God bless the iPod, fo'real.
But back to my love of '60s music. Another reason why I love it all so much is because I really, really wish I had been alive during that era so I could have been a hippie. I absolutely would have been a hippie. In some ways, I think I am one now. Don't get me wrong; I do love technology and want to have a real job someday, but I also really dig the happy-go-lucky, be natural and love the earth, be good to each other and be idealistic mindset. I would have been that girl in San Francisco with flowers in her hair (and sans mustache, Scott McKenzie is not bad looking either). Plus, things just weren't as serious in the '60s. I'm not saying that things like Vietnam and the assassinations of prolific national leaders were knee-slappin' good times, but consider something like the environment. People care about the environment today because we have really, really screwed that shit up. In the '60s, I wager that most people cared because they just loved the earth. I wish people would care about the earth just because its beautiful and the right thing to do, not because we're all terrified what will happen if we can't drive our SUV to the grocery store 3 blocks away to buy overly-packaged food chalk full of preservatives fresh from South America. But, that's another story for another day. No, the 60s were tumultuous, but they were still considerably more chill than life today.
Maybe tomorrow I will dig around in my boxes of childhood mementos for the Halloween costume I insisted on wearing three years in a row: a hippie wearing an bohemian shirt, bell bottoms, Lennon sunglasses, and a ribbon around my forehead. Or, maybe I will just update my iPod's "Golden Oldies" playlist with all my recent purchases on iTunes, and happily sing to myself in my cubicle at work. It will probably be the latter, so I hope my neighboring co-worker is prepared to hear my rendition of Steve Miller's Jungle Town. We can only hope.
paths of greatness.
I've decided that I want to use this blog as a productive platform for once. I am working on law school applications, and one thing that I am determined to do is to make my applications specific to the schools so they stand out. Plus, this forces me to really look at the schools carefully so I know I am applying for good reasons. I have about eight schools total on my list, but I am primarily looking at three, all of which are in the Chicago area. The more I research each of the three, the more they all look incredible to me and my goals for going back to school. Let me tell you about each of them; this will help me keep them clear, articulate why they are each great, and give some insight as to my true desire to go to law school.
Chicago- Kent (part of Illinois Institute of Technology)
This school is located in the heart of the Loop and has immensely appealing programs in Child and Family Law as well as its legal writing program. Child and Family Law (or C/F as I'll refer to it from here on) is the field of law specifically focused on the needs of juveniles and family matters, ranging from domestic abuse to child custody to juvenile advocacy. While I could never see myself wanting to work with divorce clients, the rest of the field is appealing to me because it works with children and provides opportunity to work in education law. Chicago-Kent has a dual degree program where you can receive a J.D./LL.M in family law (the LL.M is sort of like a certificate/masters program in a specific area of law). This means your clinicals and field experiences are all with organizations and groups that focus on family law. So, by attending Chicago-Kent and pursuing this program, I would be working with the demographic of clients that I feel I can best help.
The other draw to Chicago-Kent is its legal writing program. It is one of the best in the nation and competes with the likes of Harvard. Most law schools require first-year students to enroll in a legal writing course. Chi-Kent follows this pattern, but also requires students to take legal writing in their second and third years. So, students walk away with the skills to be concise and effective in legal writing, which sets the stage for them to do judicial clerkships which is something I would love to do. Clerkships mean you work with a judge and write opinions on cases, so you have a very tangible effect on some of the most important decisions coming out of our judicial system. Tie this in with education law, and you've got a recipe for some actual change in the way our country views education. Can I get an AMEN?
DePaul University College of Law
I love almost everything I've learned about DePaul. It has an extensive alumni network and a definite presence in the Chicago legal field. This bodes well in this market because it means I have better job prospects after graduation, particularly in a big city like Chicago. But one of the biggest perks about DePaul is their first-year specialization programs. DePaul is the only school I've seen that has designated fiirst-year seminars in specific areas of law, one of which is Juvenile/Family law (same thing as Child law, just a different set of semantics). So, as a first year student you begin delving into an area of interest right away. They pair this with your required first-year legal writing course (see above), so your training in legal writing directly corresponds to juvenile and family law. Sounds cool, right? Now add in that they have a Special Education Advocacy clinical, and you're beginning to see the bridge between law and education, which is my end goal. This also really interests me because I enjoyed working with special education while teaching, and I think it is an area in need of reform. Too often, I think we just throw money at special education. I feel that this advocacy clinical targets the need for students to receive actual help, not just monetarily-provided support that doesn't help their specific needs.
Loyola-Chicago College of Law
Originally, Loyola was the last on my list of Chicago schools. When I started researching for my personal statement for this school, however, I learned about some amazing opportunities. First, they have something called the ChildLaw and Education Institute, which is a specifically designed part of the law school that works collaboratively with teachers and adminstrators about issues in the field of education. The interdisciplinary approach supports the use of specific courses, forums, and publications that are dedicated solely to looking at issues in education (like No Child Left Behind and other things that are at the forefront of public discourse on education). I like the collaborative approach because who knows better about the issues than teachers?
The other appealing thing about Loyola is their dual-degree program awarding you an J.D./M.A. in Comparative Law and Education. This degree means I would have a masters in education, specifically emphasizing legal issues facing schools (special education, denial of education for students who have been in the juvenile justice system, homelessness, and equitable funding to name a few). The cool thing comes into play with the J.D. This dual-degree program focuses on bridging the gap between education systems around the world. There are programs in Chile, Africa, Thailand, and India that provide support for achieving education for all children in those areas. The idea is that holders of that degree would be equipped to work with education systems around the world for the betterment of all students everywhere. Who doesn't love that?!
***
The more I research, the more I feel this is really the path I am supposed to take. There are plenty of things going against me at this point (damn you, LSAT), but I know that everything happens for a reason. It is terrifying and exciting to think about all the possible routes this type of education could take me. Now, I really need to focus on my applications and get it done.
This probably means less time listening to Coldplay... or at least finding a better balance. What is life without fun, anyway? :)
Chicago- Kent (part of Illinois Institute of Technology)
This school is located in the heart of the Loop and has immensely appealing programs in Child and Family Law as well as its legal writing program. Child and Family Law (or C/F as I'll refer to it from here on) is the field of law specifically focused on the needs of juveniles and family matters, ranging from domestic abuse to child custody to juvenile advocacy. While I could never see myself wanting to work with divorce clients, the rest of the field is appealing to me because it works with children and provides opportunity to work in education law. Chicago-Kent has a dual degree program where you can receive a J.D./LL.M in family law (the LL.M is sort of like a certificate/masters program in a specific area of law). This means your clinicals and field experiences are all with organizations and groups that focus on family law. So, by attending Chicago-Kent and pursuing this program, I would be working with the demographic of clients that I feel I can best help.
The other draw to Chicago-Kent is its legal writing program. It is one of the best in the nation and competes with the likes of Harvard. Most law schools require first-year students to enroll in a legal writing course. Chi-Kent follows this pattern, but also requires students to take legal writing in their second and third years. So, students walk away with the skills to be concise and effective in legal writing, which sets the stage for them to do judicial clerkships which is something I would love to do. Clerkships mean you work with a judge and write opinions on cases, so you have a very tangible effect on some of the most important decisions coming out of our judicial system. Tie this in with education law, and you've got a recipe for some actual change in the way our country views education. Can I get an AMEN?
DePaul University College of Law
I love almost everything I've learned about DePaul. It has an extensive alumni network and a definite presence in the Chicago legal field. This bodes well in this market because it means I have better job prospects after graduation, particularly in a big city like Chicago. But one of the biggest perks about DePaul is their first-year specialization programs. DePaul is the only school I've seen that has designated fiirst-year seminars in specific areas of law, one of which is Juvenile/Family law (same thing as Child law, just a different set of semantics). So, as a first year student you begin delving into an area of interest right away. They pair this with your required first-year legal writing course (see above), so your training in legal writing directly corresponds to juvenile and family law. Sounds cool, right? Now add in that they have a Special Education Advocacy clinical, and you're beginning to see the bridge between law and education, which is my end goal. This also really interests me because I enjoyed working with special education while teaching, and I think it is an area in need of reform. Too often, I think we just throw money at special education. I feel that this advocacy clinical targets the need for students to receive actual help, not just monetarily-provided support that doesn't help their specific needs.
Loyola-Chicago College of Law
Originally, Loyola was the last on my list of Chicago schools. When I started researching for my personal statement for this school, however, I learned about some amazing opportunities. First, they have something called the ChildLaw and Education Institute, which is a specifically designed part of the law school that works collaboratively with teachers and adminstrators about issues in the field of education. The interdisciplinary approach supports the use of specific courses, forums, and publications that are dedicated solely to looking at issues in education (like No Child Left Behind and other things that are at the forefront of public discourse on education). I like the collaborative approach because who knows better about the issues than teachers?
The other appealing thing about Loyola is their dual-degree program awarding you an J.D./M.A. in Comparative Law and Education. This degree means I would have a masters in education, specifically emphasizing legal issues facing schools (special education, denial of education for students who have been in the juvenile justice system, homelessness, and equitable funding to name a few). The cool thing comes into play with the J.D. This dual-degree program focuses on bridging the gap between education systems around the world. There are programs in Chile, Africa, Thailand, and India that provide support for achieving education for all children in those areas. The idea is that holders of that degree would be equipped to work with education systems around the world for the betterment of all students everywhere. Who doesn't love that?!
***
The more I research, the more I feel this is really the path I am supposed to take. There are plenty of things going against me at this point (damn you, LSAT), but I know that everything happens for a reason. It is terrifying and exciting to think about all the possible routes this type of education could take me. Now, I really need to focus on my applications and get it done.
This probably means less time listening to Coldplay... or at least finding a better balance. What is life without fun, anyway? :)
Monday, January 03, 2011
Twenty eleven.
Here I am in 2011, and it is 1:27 in the morning. My insomnia clearly didn't catch the memo that I resolved to rid myself of it in the new year. Alas, this is when I tend to blog; during a bout of insomnia or when I actually have something to say. In a journal-like fashion, I've decided just to update on what's been going on in my fascinating life.
First off, let me say that I am really happy we are in a new decade, and as such we've changed how we speak the year. It's not "two thousand eleven." After all, you didn't say "nineteen hundred and eleven" unless you were part of the pretentious bourgeois. The new decade means we just say "twenty eleven." It seems much more efficient and classy, in my opinion.
My New Year's Eve was pretty darn successful, if I do say so myself. I made some phenomenal buffalo chicken dip to take to a party. It wasn't nearly hot enough for me, but I really, really love hot sauce. The first party we went to was at my friend's new house. He bought acreage in Van Meter and it is absolutely gorgeous when you get that far into the country. He hosted a casino-themed party, so there we played craps, poker, and blackjack. I drake NA beer the entire time because I was planning on driving us back to Des Moines for midnight. Now, most people would scoff at NA beer as being as pointless as decaf coffee. I understand that, but I actually enjoy the taste of beer. It was a really bizarre experience to be drinking something that tasted like beer, but not to feel any of the standard "buzzed" effects after 2 or 3. Maybe it's a stupid thing to take note of, but it wasn't nearly as terrible an experience as I thought it would be when I bought it (especially when the liquor store clerk asked when I was due - as in, when I would be giving birth). But the real beauty of the situation came to pass when we left at 11 o'clock and I could absolutely, 100% feel confident that I could drive.
From there we went to a house party just off Ingersoll in Des Moines. It was a beautiful old mansion that is rented out by a bunch of artsy people. As a result, the party was themed (masquerade) and there were things you'd only see at an artist party; a photo booth with an old school tri-pod camera and an actual lobster on ice were two of my favorites. I knew about a handful of people there, but everyone else turned out to be really quite nice. Turns out, a few were excited to meet me, so I suppose that helped matters. I think the most memorable story from the evening was when someone tried teaching me how to open a beer bottle with a lighter. It probably would have been successful if I had any arm strength, but instead I chipped the lighter and sliced my finger open on the bottle cap. Either way, things went pretty well.
New Year's Day I watched absurd amounts of football (well, as much as this Big 10 fan could handle) and went to Anna's family's New Years party. It was actually a lot of fun. I ate too much food and drank my volume in coffee (hey, never said I drank NA beer all night) before driving up to Fort Dodge to see my other friend, Rachel. I hadn't seen her in months and she just moved into a new house, so that provided plenty of entertainment. Allegedly, it used to be a drug house, evidenced by the bizarre drawings and quotes that are painted on the basement ceiling, as well as the paraphenilia they found in the rafters when they cleaned. But the best part was easily the conversation we had until 3am. Rachel always makes me laugh, but she also makes me think. I also believe that if you can confess something you're weary about to Rachel, you can handle anyone. This means I'm going to have an awkward conversation with my boss tomorrow that I should've had weeks ago, but just didn't have the nerve.
In a related topic, although it doesn't seem like it, I tackled that intimidating process known as "filing the FAFSA" today. I was actually quite surprised by how easy it was. The Free Application For Student Aid would probably be more complicated if I actually had any money/assets/investments, but as it turned out, they consider me an "independent student," I made an embarrassingly small amount of money last year, and I didn't have to delve into my parents' financial information. This is a blessing and a curse, I suppose, because I maxed out at the most money you can get for grad school. Blessing because that means I have more flexibility in choosing a school, a curse because that means that much more money to pay back down the line... at a higher interest rate than undergrads have to pay. Oh well. My dad can no longer tell me I'm being overdramatic when I tell him how poor I am. The government says I'm the most destitute of applicants.
I'm looking at a year full of infinite possibilities, which I know is cliche. In my immediate future, I'm just taking it day by day, which is a very hard thing for me to do because I am a planner by nature. The quote from Almost Famous seems applicable right now: "If you never take it seriously, you never get hurt." Probably not the most responsible words to live by, but for the time being I think that's ok.
Now, if only I could get a handle on my insomnia life would really be grand.
First off, let me say that I am really happy we are in a new decade, and as such we've changed how we speak the year. It's not "two thousand eleven." After all, you didn't say "nineteen hundred and eleven" unless you were part of the pretentious bourgeois. The new decade means we just say "twenty eleven." It seems much more efficient and classy, in my opinion.
My New Year's Eve was pretty darn successful, if I do say so myself. I made some phenomenal buffalo chicken dip to take to a party. It wasn't nearly hot enough for me, but I really, really love hot sauce. The first party we went to was at my friend's new house. He bought acreage in Van Meter and it is absolutely gorgeous when you get that far into the country. He hosted a casino-themed party, so there we played craps, poker, and blackjack. I drake NA beer the entire time because I was planning on driving us back to Des Moines for midnight. Now, most people would scoff at NA beer as being as pointless as decaf coffee. I understand that, but I actually enjoy the taste of beer. It was a really bizarre experience to be drinking something that tasted like beer, but not to feel any of the standard "buzzed" effects after 2 or 3. Maybe it's a stupid thing to take note of, but it wasn't nearly as terrible an experience as I thought it would be when I bought it (especially when the liquor store clerk asked when I was due - as in, when I would be giving birth). But the real beauty of the situation came to pass when we left at 11 o'clock and I could absolutely, 100% feel confident that I could drive.
From there we went to a house party just off Ingersoll in Des Moines. It was a beautiful old mansion that is rented out by a bunch of artsy people. As a result, the party was themed (masquerade) and there were things you'd only see at an artist party; a photo booth with an old school tri-pod camera and an actual lobster on ice were two of my favorites. I knew about a handful of people there, but everyone else turned out to be really quite nice. Turns out, a few were excited to meet me, so I suppose that helped matters. I think the most memorable story from the evening was when someone tried teaching me how to open a beer bottle with a lighter. It probably would have been successful if I had any arm strength, but instead I chipped the lighter and sliced my finger open on the bottle cap. Either way, things went pretty well.
New Year's Day I watched absurd amounts of football (well, as much as this Big 10 fan could handle) and went to Anna's family's New Years party. It was actually a lot of fun. I ate too much food and drank my volume in coffee (hey, never said I drank NA beer all night) before driving up to Fort Dodge to see my other friend, Rachel. I hadn't seen her in months and she just moved into a new house, so that provided plenty of entertainment. Allegedly, it used to be a drug house, evidenced by the bizarre drawings and quotes that are painted on the basement ceiling, as well as the paraphenilia they found in the rafters when they cleaned. But the best part was easily the conversation we had until 3am. Rachel always makes me laugh, but she also makes me think. I also believe that if you can confess something you're weary about to Rachel, you can handle anyone. This means I'm going to have an awkward conversation with my boss tomorrow that I should've had weeks ago, but just didn't have the nerve.
In a related topic, although it doesn't seem like it, I tackled that intimidating process known as "filing the FAFSA" today. I was actually quite surprised by how easy it was. The Free Application For Student Aid would probably be more complicated if I actually had any money/assets/investments, but as it turned out, they consider me an "independent student," I made an embarrassingly small amount of money last year, and I didn't have to delve into my parents' financial information. This is a blessing and a curse, I suppose, because I maxed out at the most money you can get for grad school. Blessing because that means I have more flexibility in choosing a school, a curse because that means that much more money to pay back down the line... at a higher interest rate than undergrads have to pay. Oh well. My dad can no longer tell me I'm being overdramatic when I tell him how poor I am. The government says I'm the most destitute of applicants.
I'm looking at a year full of infinite possibilities, which I know is cliche. In my immediate future, I'm just taking it day by day, which is a very hard thing for me to do because I am a planner by nature. The quote from Almost Famous seems applicable right now: "If you never take it seriously, you never get hurt." Probably not the most responsible words to live by, but for the time being I think that's ok.
Now, if only I could get a handle on my insomnia life would really be grand.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
finishing strong.
It was 59 degrees in Des Moines today. I walked outside and smelled fresh rain, and I could have sworn it was March. In fact, I went to lunch with a friend today and neither of us wore coats. We also drank Corona Lights (I only had one seeing as I went to work right after), which is an obligatory summer drink. However, it is obviously not March, and definitely not summer. No, instead it is the 30th of December, which means 2010 is almost over. Following that trend of logic, it is time for my end of the year reflection. So, drumroll please. 2010 was... fantastic.
I started off the year with a bang as I followed my beloved Hawkeyes to Miami for the Orange Bowl. I drove 27 hours with my friends Anne and Jake, stopping only once in the parking lot of a janky motel in Georgia to sleep for a few hours. It was altogether a terrible idea and exactly the type of thing you should do on a college roadtrip. We stayed in a hostel in Miami and met a lot of interesting people, most memorable being a guy named Beethoven from Finland. Beethoven lived his life according to the roll of the dice. Seriously, he would write down a list of 6 things and roll the dice, doing whatever corresponded to the number he rolled. This practice is what led him to Miami on his world tour, as well as doing other unsavory things that made us happy he wasn't in our room.
Shortly after that trip, I started student teaching in a freshman English classroom. Student teaching is the culminating "assessment" of your teacher training, and I was immensely excited to have actual students to give my lessons. I had a young cooperating teacher and we got along famously. I also contend that I had the absolute best students possible. They taught me a lot about myself and gave me plenty of good stories. My mom enjoyed my student teaching almost more than I did because she got to hear everything after school during our routine chips and salsa binge. I looked desperately for a teaching job throughout the spring, and left for England in May unemployed. I had faith that everything would work out, so I tried to take it in stride.
England was absolutely the experience of a lifetime. I studied abroad there before, so in a way it felt like returning for round two even though this time I would be working as a teacher. I was on the Southern coast of the country, which is a much different experience than being in London. It was quiet and slow, but nice because I experienced a type of British culture I hadn't before. I met some amazing girls who took it upon themselves to show me a good time, and a good time it was. After two months abroad, I was ready to walk on American soil again, mainly because I have an atrocious iced coffee habit, and iced coffee is non-existent in Europe.
The summer closed out with the realization that I would not have a teaching job for the fall, which was depressing and exhilarating simultaneously. How's that for conflicting emotions? It was depressing because nobody wants to be unemployed and living with their parents, but exhilarating because it meant that I had a wide open palate for life and could do whatever I wanted. The latter realization didn't come right away, I admit, and I had a certain amount of depression regarding the situation. But I'm not one to sit on the sidelines of life and let things happen to me. If you know me, you know I am much more of a proactive person who is more likely to take my destiny into my own hands.
I spent the fall readjusting to living in the same bedroom I had in high school. I spent a good amount of time giving it a face lift and refining my belongings. (Not that anybody cares, but it has a more vintage feel to it now: from the thrift store find Italian pewter dish which holds my favorite jewelry, to my grandma's 1939 edition of Wuthering Heights, to the vase of dried flowers I've been collecting since I was 15.) I also tried to refine my relationships and my habits. I dedicated more time to cultivating my relationships - both old and new - and took it upon myself to learn as much about my dad's law firm as possible. As a result, I have a good base of people surrounding me and I've gained a lot more responsibility and respect at the office. By spending so much time at the firm, I also realized how much I enjoy working in the law and helping people in that way, which led to my decision to take the LSAT.
That brings us to this winter, which has thus far been surprisingly satisfying. I say surprisingly because I generally don't like the Christmas season for reasons I don't care to blog about. I would rather be generous and kind year-round, but that's just me. So, that I've met some really amazing people even within the last few weeks is satisfying and exciting as 2011 rapidly approaches.
I am planning on bringing in the new year one of a handful of places, exactly which I'm not entirely sure of yet. This uncertainty would normally stress me out, but if there is one thing I have learned in 2010, it is that everything happens for a reason. My, does it ever.
So, to you and yours, may you have a very blessed new year... and welcome, 2011. I am very exciting for what you have in store.
I started off the year with a bang as I followed my beloved Hawkeyes to Miami for the Orange Bowl. I drove 27 hours with my friends Anne and Jake, stopping only once in the parking lot of a janky motel in Georgia to sleep for a few hours. It was altogether a terrible idea and exactly the type of thing you should do on a college roadtrip. We stayed in a hostel in Miami and met a lot of interesting people, most memorable being a guy named Beethoven from Finland. Beethoven lived his life according to the roll of the dice. Seriously, he would write down a list of 6 things and roll the dice, doing whatever corresponded to the number he rolled. This practice is what led him to Miami on his world tour, as well as doing other unsavory things that made us happy he wasn't in our room.
Shortly after that trip, I started student teaching in a freshman English classroom. Student teaching is the culminating "assessment" of your teacher training, and I was immensely excited to have actual students to give my lessons. I had a young cooperating teacher and we got along famously. I also contend that I had the absolute best students possible. They taught me a lot about myself and gave me plenty of good stories. My mom enjoyed my student teaching almost more than I did because she got to hear everything after school during our routine chips and salsa binge. I looked desperately for a teaching job throughout the spring, and left for England in May unemployed. I had faith that everything would work out, so I tried to take it in stride.
England was absolutely the experience of a lifetime. I studied abroad there before, so in a way it felt like returning for round two even though this time I would be working as a teacher. I was on the Southern coast of the country, which is a much different experience than being in London. It was quiet and slow, but nice because I experienced a type of British culture I hadn't before. I met some amazing girls who took it upon themselves to show me a good time, and a good time it was. After two months abroad, I was ready to walk on American soil again, mainly because I have an atrocious iced coffee habit, and iced coffee is non-existent in Europe.
The summer closed out with the realization that I would not have a teaching job for the fall, which was depressing and exhilarating simultaneously. How's that for conflicting emotions? It was depressing because nobody wants to be unemployed and living with their parents, but exhilarating because it meant that I had a wide open palate for life and could do whatever I wanted. The latter realization didn't come right away, I admit, and I had a certain amount of depression regarding the situation. But I'm not one to sit on the sidelines of life and let things happen to me. If you know me, you know I am much more of a proactive person who is more likely to take my destiny into my own hands.
I spent the fall readjusting to living in the same bedroom I had in high school. I spent a good amount of time giving it a face lift and refining my belongings. (Not that anybody cares, but it has a more vintage feel to it now: from the thrift store find Italian pewter dish which holds my favorite jewelry, to my grandma's 1939 edition of Wuthering Heights, to the vase of dried flowers I've been collecting since I was 15.) I also tried to refine my relationships and my habits. I dedicated more time to cultivating my relationships - both old and new - and took it upon myself to learn as much about my dad's law firm as possible. As a result, I have a good base of people surrounding me and I've gained a lot more responsibility and respect at the office. By spending so much time at the firm, I also realized how much I enjoy working in the law and helping people in that way, which led to my decision to take the LSAT.
That brings us to this winter, which has thus far been surprisingly satisfying. I say surprisingly because I generally don't like the Christmas season for reasons I don't care to blog about. I would rather be generous and kind year-round, but that's just me. So, that I've met some really amazing people even within the last few weeks is satisfying and exciting as 2011 rapidly approaches.
I am planning on bringing in the new year one of a handful of places, exactly which I'm not entirely sure of yet. This uncertainty would normally stress me out, but if there is one thing I have learned in 2010, it is that everything happens for a reason. My, does it ever.
So, to you and yours, may you have a very blessed new year... and welcome, 2011. I am very exciting for what you have in store.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Vain, gutsy faith.
The digital age is also the age of vanity. That is, those in my generation are vain because we've always had a technological platform to spout off our thoughts and opinions. Back in the day (to use a cliche I actually quite adore), people actually had to be someone for others to listen. Now, you just need to register a domain with Blogspot, Wordpress, Facebook, Twitter, so on and so forth. This gives us a sense of empowerment with a side of entitlement, but I also think it means we're a vocal group of youngins'.
This is my place of vanity. Sure, I have Facebook and Twitter, but I don't actually do much with either site. I use Facebook to keep in touch with people, but were it not for my mates in England, I'd have no qualms about deleting my account. I don't like people all up in my business and I like to control what others know about me, and Facebook is rapidly encouraging the negation of my preferences in both areas. Twitter is where I spout off random thoughts that nobody cares about, and it is a place where you can really carve out who you are for other people to see. For instance, I've never Tweeted about how much I adore the state of Michigan, but I tweet about my teaching experiences. So, in the Twitter-sphere, my "followers" know I teach, but they don't know such a huge caveat of my personality - how I miss going to Michigan and think it's one of the greatest places in the entire world.
I address this only because I do have a purpose for this blog post, and I want to ensure it's understood why I'm discussing this topic here. I have no idea if anybody reads this. Were I a gambler, I would say no, nobody reads this. Why would they? I don't believe I have this URL published anywhere. In fact, I repeatedly tried to sign into Wordpress to find this account, only to figure out I used Blogspot. Yeah, obviously I'm the target blogger. So, this has become a type of journal for me, but a journal which has upped the ante because it is, but definition, public. It's not the reconstructed green journal I bought at a specialty store in the East Village. That is absolutely private, and they type of book I'd be horrified if it were read by anyone. No, instead this blog is a place for me to indulge my vanity in a very Kelli-way. Since I don't throw this URL out there, in a weird way I am controlling the information that people see, because they likely won't see this. That's a but metacognitive, so let's just move along now, shall we.
Let me discuss a little thing here called law school. This is a subject that has been dominating my thoughts for the past few weeks, and before that I had to deliberately push it to the back of my mind to focus on my classes. But now that I've finished them (I received an A in both, of course), I can indulge myself into my research and planning all I want. I get so much joy out of doing this, it's unnecessarily nerdy. Regardless, I've been researching a great deal. There is a website that is uncreatively named www.top-law-schools.com, which has a wealth of information about rankings, programs, and honest reviews from students and graduates. It also has a dynamic forum with absurds amounts of knowledge that I've been sifting through as I pound out my personal statement (I'm currently on draft #5). Like any internet site, there are truly articulate, thoughtful people who want to share their knowedge with others, right alongside people who post idiotic things that make me question the worth of humanity. Mixed in these posts are people who probably don't know how ridiculous they sound, and this is where my thoughts for this blog form.
I would never be cavalier to say that something is absolutely going to happen. I consciously preface statements about law school with a "if I get in" qualifier, because I do believe in Karma (in a Christian way, because I do love Jesus). I even go so far as to avoid the term "safety school", because nothing is guaranteed in this life, and law school admission is absolutely one of those uncertainties. Instead, I say things like "_____ isn't my first choice." But I digress... Without going into the "law school lingo," let's just say there are a bunch of dumbos on these forums, and it's hard not to sit there and think that if they can get into law school, I definitely can.
I have absolute faith that what is supposed to happen will. In fact, I know that I have no real say in the matter, because there are things at work much more influential and powerful than I. Sure, I need to work hard and try my best, but everything happens for a reason. I believe in the deepest part of my heart that this is the right thing for me to do - to try. I know that if I didn't, I would wonder for the rest of my life if I should've gone to law school. At least this way, I know. All I want to do is to make a difference in somebody's life. I want to go to work everyday and make the world a little bit better in some way. That is my dream job. I know that teachers do that, but I am also a firm believe that there are a lot of teachers in the field who shouldn't be, because if there is one profession that deserves only members who are absolutely passionate about what they do, it's teachers. So, personally, for me to enter to field without that passion is hypocritical and retroactive.
That leads me to law school. The profession fulfills a lot of things I was lacking in teaching: the mental challenge and stimulation, the individual nature of the job, and the go-get-'em mentality that defines many areas of law. I could sit here all day and strengthen my argument and tie up loose ends - afterall, I did study non-stop for the LSAT not a few weeks ago. But the important part is doing what you know is right. I follow my gut without blinking. It never steers me wrong, and even when I think it has, the situation usually just hasn't fully panned out yet.
That gut feeling is what led me to be the crappiest friend in the world leading up the LSAT. That gut is why I willingly do the bitch work at the office every day. That gut is why I sit at Mars Cafe on a Wednesday night and handwrite 4 different versions of an introduction instead of go out for martinis at the Lift. When I went to pick up my drunk friend from a bar at 1:30 this morning and her friend asked me what I did, that gut is why I answered without thinking, "I'm going to law school."
Faith is a great thing.
This is my place of vanity. Sure, I have Facebook and Twitter, but I don't actually do much with either site. I use Facebook to keep in touch with people, but were it not for my mates in England, I'd have no qualms about deleting my account. I don't like people all up in my business and I like to control what others know about me, and Facebook is rapidly encouraging the negation of my preferences in both areas. Twitter is where I spout off random thoughts that nobody cares about, and it is a place where you can really carve out who you are for other people to see. For instance, I've never Tweeted about how much I adore the state of Michigan, but I tweet about my teaching experiences. So, in the Twitter-sphere, my "followers" know I teach, but they don't know such a huge caveat of my personality - how I miss going to Michigan and think it's one of the greatest places in the entire world.
I address this only because I do have a purpose for this blog post, and I want to ensure it's understood why I'm discussing this topic here. I have no idea if anybody reads this. Were I a gambler, I would say no, nobody reads this. Why would they? I don't believe I have this URL published anywhere. In fact, I repeatedly tried to sign into Wordpress to find this account, only to figure out I used Blogspot. Yeah, obviously I'm the target blogger. So, this has become a type of journal for me, but a journal which has upped the ante because it is, but definition, public. It's not the reconstructed green journal I bought at a specialty store in the East Village. That is absolutely private, and they type of book I'd be horrified if it were read by anyone. No, instead this blog is a place for me to indulge my vanity in a very Kelli-way. Since I don't throw this URL out there, in a weird way I am controlling the information that people see, because they likely won't see this. That's a but metacognitive, so let's just move along now, shall we.
Let me discuss a little thing here called law school. This is a subject that has been dominating my thoughts for the past few weeks, and before that I had to deliberately push it to the back of my mind to focus on my classes. But now that I've finished them (I received an A in both, of course), I can indulge myself into my research and planning all I want. I get so much joy out of doing this, it's unnecessarily nerdy. Regardless, I've been researching a great deal. There is a website that is uncreatively named www.top-law-schools.com, which has a wealth of information about rankings, programs, and honest reviews from students and graduates. It also has a dynamic forum with absurds amounts of knowledge that I've been sifting through as I pound out my personal statement (I'm currently on draft #5). Like any internet site, there are truly articulate, thoughtful people who want to share their knowedge with others, right alongside people who post idiotic things that make me question the worth of humanity. Mixed in these posts are people who probably don't know how ridiculous they sound, and this is where my thoughts for this blog form.
I would never be cavalier to say that something is absolutely going to happen. I consciously preface statements about law school with a "if I get in" qualifier, because I do believe in Karma (in a Christian way, because I do love Jesus). I even go so far as to avoid the term "safety school", because nothing is guaranteed in this life, and law school admission is absolutely one of those uncertainties. Instead, I say things like "_____ isn't my first choice." But I digress... Without going into the "law school lingo," let's just say there are a bunch of dumbos on these forums, and it's hard not to sit there and think that if they can get into law school, I definitely can.
I have absolute faith that what is supposed to happen will. In fact, I know that I have no real say in the matter, because there are things at work much more influential and powerful than I. Sure, I need to work hard and try my best, but everything happens for a reason. I believe in the deepest part of my heart that this is the right thing for me to do - to try. I know that if I didn't, I would wonder for the rest of my life if I should've gone to law school. At least this way, I know. All I want to do is to make a difference in somebody's life. I want to go to work everyday and make the world a little bit better in some way. That is my dream job. I know that teachers do that, but I am also a firm believe that there are a lot of teachers in the field who shouldn't be, because if there is one profession that deserves only members who are absolutely passionate about what they do, it's teachers. So, personally, for me to enter to field without that passion is hypocritical and retroactive.
That leads me to law school. The profession fulfills a lot of things I was lacking in teaching: the mental challenge and stimulation, the individual nature of the job, and the go-get-'em mentality that defines many areas of law. I could sit here all day and strengthen my argument and tie up loose ends - afterall, I did study non-stop for the LSAT not a few weeks ago. But the important part is doing what you know is right. I follow my gut without blinking. It never steers me wrong, and even when I think it has, the situation usually just hasn't fully panned out yet.
That gut feeling is what led me to be the crappiest friend in the world leading up the LSAT. That gut is why I willingly do the bitch work at the office every day. That gut is why I sit at Mars Cafe on a Wednesday night and handwrite 4 different versions of an introduction instead of go out for martinis at the Lift. When I went to pick up my drunk friend from a bar at 1:30 this morning and her friend asked me what I did, that gut is why I answered without thinking, "I'm going to law school."
Faith is a great thing.
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